There are those friends who you really do not mind losing and then there are those who you really miss. Often, you are not totally sure why you lost them. There is no fight to point to or an argument to blame. Perhaps you simply let too much time pass before you talked to them. Perhaps you did something to hurt them and you did not realize it. Perhaps you stayed the same and the other person changed. Perhaps you changed, without knowing it, and the other person remained the same. Perhaps you were never as close of friends as you thought you were, this thought hurts the most. All I know is that my sister and I both have a couple friends who we lost and we are not totally sure why they do not talk to us anymore.
Finally, there are those friends who you still have. However, you feel a bit more distance between you both lately. You still talk and hang out but something is not the same. All you want is for things to go back to how they were. There is still hope for these friendships but when those feelings start to settle, it is hard to reverse the feelings. I often feel like people grow up and grow "out" of the friendship. Fortunately or unfortunately, we do not grow up and we do not mature. We keep that kid like spirit and put on a smile as we really do enjoy life. We act silly and still like to go on adventures. We do not really do the whole drinking scene or whatnot because we are still kids at heart. But sometimes we wish we did, especially when that sense of loneliness and sadness overwhelms us. We remember those friends and solemnly reflect and reminisce about the good times. Is it just us who feels like this or is this common amongst our peers? Let us know, please.
I think this poem best conveys the purpose of certain people in our lives through the various stages of our lives...enjoy! : )
ReplyDeleteA REASON, A SEASON OR A LIFETIME
People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a Godsend, and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.
When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway); and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
And here is another one that beautifully speaks to character and adversity. It's called "A Carrot, An Egg and a Coffee Bean"
ReplyDeleteAre You a Carrot, An Egg, or a Coffee Bean?
A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved a new one arose.
Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water. In the first, she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs and the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil without saying a word.
In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a bowl.
Turning to her daughter, she asked, "Tell me what do you see?"
"Carrots, eggs, and coffee," she replied.
She brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. She then asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled, as she tasted its rich aroma.
The daughter then asked. "What does it mean, mother?"
Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity—boiling water—but each reacted differently.
The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak.
The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened.
The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water they had changed the water.
"Which are you?" she asked her daughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?"
Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity, do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?
Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and a hardened heart?
Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor.
If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situation around you. When the hours is the darkest and trials are their greatest do you elevate to another lever?
How do you handle Adversity? Are you a Carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?